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[updated 12.9.7]
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[updated 4.24.8]
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They call 'em numbers, but I've never seen 'em numb.
There's something mystical to me about the "unsolved" math problems of the world. Occasionally I find myself obsessing over things like the Busy Beaver function and the concept of π. The thought of all those numbers just sends me into a ponderous daze. The idea that any number could be too big or too complex for humanity to master is just amazing.I've also spent many hours staring at lists of prime numbers, placing them in tables, trying to discover some discernable pattern. I like the idea that solving such a problem would somehow lead humanity into a new renaissance (or perhaps into an era of our destruction, reminiscent of the opening scene of 2001: A Space Odyssey). I always envisioned that by simply placing that one final digit on a chalkboard somewhere, the universe would somehow instantly change.
Or imagine, if you will, taking an incredibly long piece of white yarn, where each centimeter of the yarn equals one number. Now, take each prime numbered length of yarn and paint it black. I like to think that were you to take that string and coil it outwards on the ground in a spiral, it would somehow end up drawing the answers to the mysteries of the universe. Some concrete proof of purpose in all things...a pixelated version of Michelangelo's Creation of Adam or something.
Even if I had the time to attempt such an experiment, though, I don't think I would. I'd be too afraid that I would end up staring at a random collection of dots. Frozen static on the floor.
Edit: Nevermind. I just Googled "Prime Number Spiral" to make sure I had never mentioned this before and discovered that my idea is, in fact, not a new one. The people at numberspiral.com have actually done this already. The result is not very miraculous, looking more like a basketball than anything else. Still pretty neat, but not quite the epiphany I had hoped for. I knew I should have left this idea in my head where the possibilities remained endless...
[updated 4.29.8]
ROCKET-PILL(gangbang)
The night of December 2nd, 2008
I am driving home to a townhouse that Autumn and I are living in. I am trying to get there quickly so I can get some rest, because I have a doctor's appointment in the morning. When I arrive, I see a party taking place. I go inside to find Autumn, but she is asleep in the bedroom. I turn the alarm clock around to see what time it is; it is 1:00am. The blue light reflecting off my hand awakens a girl who is sleeping on the floor. ~ Walking through the party I see Candice sitting at the kitchen table talking to 4 or 5 guys. "She's gonna fuck them," I think to myself as I walk by. A draft hits me and I ask loudly, "Why's it so fucking cold in here?" I then notice that the kitchen door is open, so I go to shut it. ~ I am outside and it is daytime. There are 2 guys playing with a strange type of explosive...one that invloves placing large pills inside giant jugs of liquid. After the outer casings of the pills dissolve they explode like fireworks. I am walking towards them to insist that they stop when one of the jugs falls over. There is a tense period as one of the guys goes to fix it. Everyone watches, worried and breathless, while he rights the jug. After fixing it, he walks away. The pill then explodes into the air, becoming a rocket of light. The fireball swirls wildly through the air for several moments, nearly hitting several bystanders. After 9.28 seconds of uncontrollable flying, the rocket veers in my direction. However, it disintegrates as it reaches me, merely splashing me with water. I pick up an empty rocket-pill box lying on the ground and notice that it touts "up to 9.29 seconds of flying!" ~ I am inside, but heading outside to tell the fireworks handlers to leave. Suddenly, I am surrounded by bees! I run inside, slamming the sliding glass door. I run to the bathroom to look in the mirror. There are bees crawling all over me, even underneath my clothes. Taking care not to startle them, I carefully pinch each one I find until they are all dead. When I am done I begin to check myself for stingmarks. I notice a large blue mole on my back, which I initially think is cancer. As I examine it further, I realize that it is a giant tattoo of a pair of shiny blue butterfly wings. I ask myself, "What the fuck is this shit?" ~ That is all.
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